Twinkle Twinkle Little Star

I am getting so tired of people doubting me. Or even worse--calling me a liar-- when I have the courtesy to let them know of my star sightings. After all, sightings are so common here that it's really no big deal to us residents. I just feel that I have a duty to all the little people I know back in the Heartland, back in the Midwest, the South, and the East, to let them know what is going on out here. So when I tell people that I saw Pamela Anderson Lee at a Little League game (stringy bleached blond hair, layered t-shirts, looks like she's been around a few blocks a few times) or Jerry Seinfeld at a burger place (burger, half a bun, no fries, looks exactly like Jerry Seinfeld, jeans, blue polo shirt, driving an in-perfect-condition powder blue 1970's VW Bug), why must they doubt me? IF I were going to make up a sighting, wouldn't I come up with one just slightly better than, say, Pamela Anderson? I mean, c'mon, I would at least throw a Barbra Streisand or a Julia Roberts at you, wouldn't I? I am just trying to report breaking news as it occurs. And I can't always get a good photo. I only have a Canon PowerShot. It has a tiny little zoom. Sometimes you are just going to have to be satisfied with Pamela back or Jerry's VW. It's called TRUST, people. Get with it.